Thursday, February 5, 2009

how is it.....

During the 7 days of full-out celebrating the Chinese New Year, fire works and firecrackers went of all through the night, and into the day. Even in our apartment, 27 stories up, they got to be pretty annoying!

On the third night, I was laying in bed, at about 3 am, wide awake, thinking of rude things to yell at everyone beneath us, lighting off those stupid fireworks. It sounded like we were in the middle of a war zone. I kept having bazaar dreams, where we were running from guerrillas and fighting for our lives.

I realize that is how a good portion of the people in the world will live out their whole lives. In the middle of bombs, machine guns, and blood. There are those who will be born into that life, and die in that life. There are those who will never know what a “silent night’ is.

Matthew and I watched a movie the other night. Defiance. About some Jews who hid in the forests of Poland for years, hiding from the Nazis. There was one scene in which maybe 80 men were running around in the middle of an open field, killing each other. It was so STUPID. So, un-civilized. So, IN HUMAN, I thought. I wanted to yell at them, and just before I made a fool out of myself, I remembered that it was just a movie :)

But still, that is happening, all over the world.

And the Father gave up HIS SON, his SON, for THAT? For those morons, running around, acting worse than animals. At least animals just kill for food. The Father watched his son bleed. Watched his son call out to him, in agony, and didn’t answer him. The Father turned his back on his son, in his worst hour, for the sake of his creation.

I can’t even handle the tears my 2 year old cries, when she skins up a knee.
The frightened little yelp my infant lets out when she wakes up and realizes I am not holding her breaks my heart.

I cannot understand, I cannot imagine the love my heavenly father has for me. For the world. For the monsters who are right now running around shooting children for no reason. I cannot fathom the depth of a heart that gives his only son as a replacement. Its not a story. Its not a lie. It is the truth. It is the only reason I can find the strength to go on living on this earth.

“ How MIGHTY are you works! The whole earth tells of your greatness!”

1 comment:

mama said...

Our Father's sacrifice...his son's sacrifice...for us...for everyone. So well put. ~ mom z